“They say....That when you die, you see a tunnel of light. And it’s when you reach that tunnel, that your life flashes before your eyes...Though I can’t say much flashed before mine. For I hadn’t lived very long, so therefore hadn’t had much of a life.
But what washed over me most, was what I could have done. And what I didn’t do. I had never made it past apprenticeship. Or gotten my gem that would have sat atop my staff when I past the final tests. I also had never fallen in love....” ~ Elowen
The Swords of the Light
Chapter 1: From the Loner,
To the Elite Warrior,
To the ones Below
The two worlds haven't met for eons. And that's the way most liked it.
The ones on the Earth Below - Falion - stayed below, the ones on the Earth Above -Cevlon - stayed above. There was no interaction, no connection. Nothing.
They were convinced that this is what Eleyos would have wanted.
But little did they know just how blind they were.
.:+:.
Cevlon - Haven:
The boy clad in silver and black armor that glinted in the sun, sat on the roofs of the low houses that made their home on the Earth Above. His keen bright blue eyes took in the crowd below him as he waited for his prey.
The wind blew his tussled brown hair and he was thankful to Eleyos that he cut it short unlike most of the boys his age.
His grip flexed around his long bow he held in his left hand and rested it on his crouched knee.
He watched the market place carefully. An image of the wanted burned behind his eyelids. He sat silently as he tried to find the one that would get him a nice fat pouch of ywens.
He knew that most people disapproved of what had happened with his life. Not that he listened to them anyways. Others considered him messed up and a nobody, but he didn't really care all that much. It was his life, despite who his father was, and what had happened to his brother. It was still his own life. But that didn't necessarily mean he was a bad person.
Just misunderstood.
He made the mistake of taking a glance behind him. Abandoning his post on the roof. He strung his bow over his head and slid down to the ground below.
Landing with a low thud in his knee high leather boots, he casually shuffled over to the shear drop of Cevlon.
Crouching, he gazed down at the Earth Below. It was definitely different from the Earth Above. The Earth Above was actually just one big city called Haven.
History has it, that when Eleyos created the world, both of the Earths were one. But then Eleyos's most beautiful creation, Viglour, double crossed him, and threatened to destroy the world and everything in it.
Eleyos quickly gathered the people he could into a safe haven. And rose the city into the air beyond Viglour's reach. But apparently, some humans were left behind. And the legends have it, they've now become savages, and seek revenge on the ones that live in Haven, because they made it and the ones below didn't.
They also say that they have horrible group of people clothed in white robes called the Magi who can cast a spell on you just by looking at you.
No one in Haven ever wanted to meet one from the Earth Below.
However, it was the Elite Warrior's job to keep the Haven safe from all things. So they also patrolled the walls of Haven, and kept an eye out for trouble below.
The boy rose to his feet and glanced back at the market. Waving his hand dismissively at it. He decided to ignore the bounty.
"What's another day?" He muttered to himself.
Taking a few steps backwards, he ran forward and threw himself over the edge of the Earth Above.
.:+:.
Cevlon:
"Sonera!"
The girl turned her head, the wind sent her silver hair out behind her, resembling a streak of lightening, or so he thought.
"Yes Kade?" She asked, urging her yerto to fly faster.
Kade looked down at Sonera's bright yerto.
Yertos were blessings given to the Earth Above from Eleyos himself. They were giant birds with the most soft feathers. They had small beaks, and long spindly legs, though they were strong. Their wing span was about 14 feet across, and they all came in vibrant colors.
Sonera's yerto was a bright orange color, where as Kade’s was midnight purple.
Kade gestured over to the Earth Above. She glanced over just in time to see someone dive off the ground and fall through the sky. He came close to the Earth Below before his yerto finally swooped in and caught the falling boy on it’s back.
“What an idiot.” Sonera stated in her usual emotionless tone.
Kade scoffed.
“Doesn’t he know that doing that is the easiest way for him to die? Or worse, he might actually land on the Earth Below?” She was really asking herself more then she was asking Kade.
“You’re doing it again.” He stated. Looking out at the sun dipping below the horizon.
“Huh?”
He laughed.
“You’re talking to yourself again.”
“Oh. And that’s a bad thing huh.”
Again, Kade chuckled.
“I wouldn’t call it bad, I would just say it’s a little unusual. That’s all.”
Sonera nodded, and the two were quiet for a moment as they made their rounds.
Kade rolled his shoulders to move the armor around, and also to loosen up his tense muscles.
He glanced down and saw the red colors of his armor, and his cape that was only given to a lieutenant.
“Come on.” Sonera said, giving him one of her rare smiles. “Our shift just ended.”
Kade grinned.
“Oh yeah. There’s that feast in the plaza for us. Well this should be fun.” He remarked as the two steered their yertos homebound.
.:+:.
Falion - Western Eleyos Monastery:
White robes could be seen all along the high stone walls that surrounded Eleyos’s temple.
The youngest of all the monks who was only of the age 15, dashed across the cobblestone courtyard, and up the stairs to one monk in particular.
“Are they coming, master?” she asked, pealing away the deep hood of her robe, revealing her light ginger hair that fell to her shoulders.
Her master looked down at his apprentice with a solemn face. He nodded once, and they both turned to look outside the walls.
There, an army of mad driven men and women marched towards the temple. Because they were crossing the Vast Plain, all of their numbers were exposed, which was both good and bad.
The monks shifted uncomfortably, the girl’s master shouted orders to defend the Inner Sanctum of the temple.
“There must be hundreds of thousands.” The girl gapped as the massive army made their way towards the small temple.
“Elowen.” She turned to her master. “Come, we must prepare you for your journey.”
The two walked briskly into the temple.
Other monks were rushing about with the only weapon they had in hand, ready to defend their temple to the last breath.
All of this, the army outside, the set jaws of the monks as they gathered their stored energy, this all scared Elowen to the bone.
Obediently following her master, they walked right into the heart of the temple.
Elowen had never been this deep before, and wasn’t quite sure where they were going.
Walking down several long flights of stairs, she noticed the walls turn to rock, she figured that they were now were under the soil of the ground.
She was curious on where they were going, but she knew better then to break the silence.
Coming to the end of the stairs she saw an iron door that looked as strong as the rock walls.
Two monks stood guard, and only stepped aside when Elowen’s master nodded to them.
Her master pushed open the door and the two walked pass the monk guards, and into a small round room.
Elowen couldn’t keep quiet any longer.
“This is the Inner Sanctum.” She whispered in awe.
“Yes child.” Her master replied softly. “Now you must listen to me very carefully.” He said sternly.
Elowen got over her momentary excitement, and sobered up.
“What I am going to ask you to do is of vital importance. Do you understand?”
Elowen nodded.
“Do you remember the stories? About the four Supreme Gems?”
Again, Elowen nodded.
“You must get all four Gems if there is to be any hope for both this Earth and the one Above.”
She hesitated.
“Master, they have all been lost. No one knows where they are anymore. They were lost when Eleyos separated the world.”
“Ah,” Her master said with a look in his eye that Elowen knew all too well.
“That is exactly what you were suppose to think.”
Elowen’s jaw dropped as her master turned back to the room.
Peaking around him, Elowen saw a pedestal. Looking at the top she saw one of the Lost Gems.
Elowen’s keen eyes immediately found the trace of magic that told her there was a ward around the pedestal. The pedestal looked slightly disoriented if she looked at it at an angle. Like a mirage on the desert floor from the heart rising.
Her master stepped over to the pedestal and held out his hand.
“The ward is very strong. I’ll need your help.”
Elowen stepped up next to the elder man and raised her own hands.
“Vik’oura loctinya.” They chanted. As they did, Elowen watched the protection ward melt away in a rain of light.
They stopped the spell and took deep breaths as the spell took a slight toll on their energy source.
“Which one is this?” Elowen asked. Mesmerized by the soft silver-blue gem.
“This one is Stargazer.” Her master explained. “It is said, that this stone actually holds dust from a fallen star that escaped the night’s sky.” He reached over and picked up the small gem.
He turned to Elowen, who held out her hand. Carefully, he placed it in her open palm.
The Gem was about as big as a walnut, and was in the shape of a tear drop.
Elowen noticed a thin chain attached to the top of the tear tip.
She glanced up at her master, who nodded.
She slipped the chain over her head, the Gem was warm, and what was odd, was that it seemed to have a pulse.
Elowen let out a little gasp as it’s subtle glow grew brighter and brighter.
She threw a scared glance at her master, who looked pleased however.
Silver-blue starlight flowed out of the Gem and suddenly formed into a figure.
Elowen gapped at the creature that now floated before her.
It’s fur was fluffy and soft looking. It was colored like the Gem.
Silver-blue.
It was small and resembled a white tiger, only cuter and more cuddly.
“What-what is it?” she asked in a whisper.
“Well why don’t you ask?” He master suggested.
Elowen nodded and cleared her throat slightly.
“Do-do you have a name?” She asked hesitantly.
The little tiger looked at her for a moment.
A flash of fear ran through Elowen, before the tiger cub spoke.
“Lorem!” It cried with glee. Elowen’s eyebrows rose.
“What are you?” she asked. Lorem just cocked his head and looked at her funny.
“Aw.” Elowen said with a growing smile. “You’re just so cute!”
Lorem giggled and floated into Elowen’s arms.
“Elowen,” She looked up at her master. “Here is a map of the Earth Below.” He showed her a page that had been yellowed with age.
Some of the lines on the map were faded and smudged. The edges were ripped and torn a bit.
“This will show you where the other Gems are when you ask it to. Keep Stargazer close, and don’t let anyone know you have it unless it is absolutely necessary and you trust them with your life!”
Her master handed her the map. Momentarily letting go of Lorem, she parted her white robes and hid the paper in a pouch she had hanging off her belt.
Closing her robes again, she cuddled Lorem, and had the feeling that the two of them would become good friends.
“Alright. Now you must go.”
Her master took her hand and they ran up the stairs, but instead of going back out into the courtyard, they went to a stone wall at the back of the temple.
“Ambros!”
Elowen looked over as another monk came running up with a pack and Elowen’s Magi staff.
She slung the pack over her shoulders and moved Lorem to one arm, as she took a hold of her familiar white wood staff. The top had a slot for what the Magi called a ’booster-gem’. Giving their spells more power, with less energy.
Elowen didn’t have one yet because she hadn’t passed the final test.
And she had a feeling she wasn’t going to.
Running her hand over the vine-like decorations at the top of the staff, she cringed as she heard a battle wage outside the temple.
Her master repeated the same spell to remove wards and a sudden doorway appeared in the seemingly solid stone wall.
Magic wasn’t a new thing for Elowen, so she wasn’t surprised.
“You must go.” Her master glanced over at the barred doors.
Monks were trying to keep the Infidels from breaking in.
Elowen could hear them grunting on the other side.
They were getting closer.
“Now! You must go! Now!! Don’t let them see you. If you make it to the Southern For-Most Forest you can avoid them. Find the other Gems and keep your head low.”
Elowen nodded. Stepping through the door she made it just in time to see the Infidels burst through the main door and murder six monks in the process.
She gasped in fear and her master shouted at her to go before he closed the wall again.
Lorem meowed at her and she quickly backed up from the dying cries inside the temple.
Dashing across the plain she ran as fast as she could. Muttering a prayer to Eleyos to keep her safe.
I really like the plot. All the places and names are different and unique. A suggestion I have would be to organize the layout a bit better so the reader isn't jumping all over the place. Also you might want to considering giving Elowen a larger introduction. The reader has formed no attachment and she is set off on this journey. She seems very inexperienced and I believe you mentioned she was 15 but I feel more like shes 8. I hope I'm not overwhelming or discouraging you. I truly like the story and am anxious to read more!
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